Author: WhiteWitch
•12:30
I went for a long walk today to pick California Poppy. It's a really beautiful plant. It's growing all over, and I'm wondering if it's trying to tell me something. It looks like fire to me. Maybe I need some fire in my life. I think I need fire in my heart. I feel cold inside. I've dried some California Poppy to try as tea, and I've read how bad it tastes but the tea I made was a little weak and I ended up not minding the taste at all.

Yesterday I drank my first cup of California Poppy tea, and I'm drinking my second cup right now. It feels like it opens up my heart a little. I don't know. I need to spend more time with it before I know for sure how it effects me. It also seems to ease my anxiety. I've been feeling terrible anxious lately. Yesterday and today has been very trying for me. I notice more and more how alone and unsafe I feel, and how angry I feel at life. The anger surprised me. I think I've been bottling it up deep inside me, and I've closed myself to life and the hurts it brings. I feel like I don't fit in anywhere right now. I need to change my attitude of life being out to get me. I think I don't trust it at all, perhaps because of what I went through when my parents and sister died.

Anyway, I sense that California Poppy can help me. I think it can help me open up and allow myself to feel things again.
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2 kommentarer:

On 14. mai 2009 kl. 16:42 , Dubious sa...

I like the little elf-hats that California poppies wear on their blossoms before they're ready to open. These caps dry up just before the emerging flower opens, and if you look closely at a patch of poppies, you can find some hats that you may pinch off, and it feels like you're helping free a flower!

May you learn to feel as free one day.

Hugs and warm wishes to you.

 
On 14. mai 2009 kl. 17:23 , WhiteWitch sa...

Thanks. I'll look for those little elf-hats. Have you been using California Poppy as well? I hung a few up to dry on my bedroom wall :) I dream of walking into a room filled with herbs drying from the ceiling.

Warm hugs back to you. I hope you're day is a good one :)